He sent me a taco.
So I sent him an eggplant.
We held hands and decided that this was romance.
He took me to an apple bees where he watched the TV.
We sat in a booth playing partners for what felt like an eternity.
Was I nervous? No. Was he?
I could tell when he chuckled distinctively.
He told me my ring was in the fryer.
Then asked me if I’d ever sang with a choir.
When he kissed me it was like we’d made love already.
I imagined it would be wild like the Serengeti.
He brought me back to his home
When I realized we weren’t alone.
The lights outside were dimming against the waning sky.
Which was when I decided I really liked this guy.
But despite his charm and wit, I found out I should’ve quit.
Shortly after we ordered the pie.
For the person inside was a big surprise.
Because it turns out it was his mother.
That wasn’t the worst of it.
Because that is what sets me apart.
My standards are low for some super special bro.
So I hoisted this aside, looked her right in the eye.
Then proceeded to go and get nailed.
The road to his house was treacherous.
He had set me up for what now felt like an obvious mess.
A few days later he got upset when I started to cry
because I realized that he was just another lame guy.
The magic had disappeared after I had
filled myself with fear that I would be alone for yes, another year.
